You can’t consent to being hurt

I spent a day as headmistress of an adult school this week. There were geography and science tests, art class and recorder practise, school dinners, milk at break, uniform inspections, and of course, heaps of caning. At lunch we all emerged from our roles somewhat and chatted about other spanko experiences.

 

“At another school I attend”, said Simon, a chubby 65 year old schoolboy, “the teacher almost got done for ABH.”

 

“I beg your pardon?” I said,  spoonful of spotted dick hovering inelegantly about my chin.

 

“Yup. New pupil complained she was hitting him too hard and went to the police.”

 

“Blimey! And…what happened?”

 

“He didn’t pursue it. Worried about the publicity I think. Wants to come back to the school now, although obviously no one wants him.”

 

“But surely there’d be a trail of emails, payments, evidence he’d consented…?”

 

 

“Makes no difference!” Ben piped up. Ben is an insanely handsome plumber, so handsome that being in the same room with him makes me anxious, and possesses a passion for black school plimsolls. “Like that bloke who got covered in clingfilm and had a heart attack. He’d begged to be covered in clingfilm. He’d done it before, no bother. Mummification was his life, his passion. There were emails to prove it, everyone swore the man was consenting, more than consenting. On this occasion he overheated and died. The man who’d wrapped him got five years for manslaughter.”

 

“Woah!” I have wrapped people and been wrapped myself. This was horrifying news. I googled it under the table. Absolutely true, every word.

 

“You can’t consent to being hurt, that’s the rub.”

 

“Can’t you?”

 

“No. Operation Spanner set the precedent. Look it up.”

 

I did. In the late 1980s Operation Spanner was an investigation into private, same sex, consensual sadomasochistic encounters, which resulted in 43 men being named, and 16 prosecuted, for assault occasioning actual bodily harm. The House of Lords ruled that giving consent to violent acts is not a valid legal defence. A peculiar judgment, many felt, given it doesn’t extend to all forms of consensual violence. Bodily injury resulting from boxing or other sports has long been legal under British law, precisely because the injured party consented to them. This double standard with regard to injuries sustained through sport and those sustained through consensual BDSM isn’t unique to Britain – the same is true in the United States, and many other countries too.

 

If it intended to discourage BDSM, Operation Spanner failed utterly. Instead, the widespread publicity surrounding the case greatly increased knowledge around kink.

 

So I’ve been breaking the law all these years. On a practical note, it becomes all the more critical only to play with people you trust. On a philosophical note, how dare anyone tell consenting adults that their particular version of fun, conducted privately, isn’t legal? I can break someone’s nose in a boxing ring, where children might be watching, but not in my own house, by squashing a chap’s face with my ample buttocks – a chap who has not only consented, but has been begging and saving for years to be allowed the privilege? Extraordinary.

 

Simon, Ben and I shook our heads, drained our milk bottles, and headed back to the classroom